One of my students, a handsome and charming five year old boy, was rummaging around in my bag and discovered my makeup compact. I opened it up and let him look at himself in the mirror. After a few seconds, he pushed it away and said, "I don't want to see my face."
"Why not?" I asked him. "You have such a beautiful face."
"No, I don't." he said. "I hate myself."
I was aghast. "No, no, please don't say that. You're very handsome. I love to look at your face. Doesn't your Mommy always tell you how cute you are?"
He looked at me like I was crazy. "Mommy never says anything like that."
Excuse me while I go murder Mommy.
Proposed Law: Poetic Justice
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3 hours ago
8 comments:
You go, girl!!!
Sounds like there is much more to this story. Not sure if I really want to hear it, though.
Glad he has at least one adult figure in his life telling me that he is cute.
It could be something mothers take for granted and they only concern themselves with discipling the children, then the child doesn't realize that the mother loves them and thinks their cute too, thats the importance of positive motivation for children.
Usually kids are supposed to have a lot of self confidence. Like the story of someone coming into a kindergarden classroom and asking the children "how many of you can draw" and all hands shot up. Then she went into a High school classroom and asked "how many of you can draw" and like one or two hands slowly went up. Part of being a kid is to think they are capable of doing anything.
At that young age where they are learning all the hard stuff its important for them to think that way and it would be a shame for a mother to take it away from them.
Back to this story, I think its important for parents to show affection for their children, kids need motherly love to help them grow and feel comfortable and strong about how they are.
How horrible.
Did you find out what's going on? Is the kid already asleep when Mommy comes home at night, so she doesn't see him to compliment and cuddle him, or what?
You only have a little while left in the school year. Tell him he's special in some way every day! You'll make a difference in his life!
Poor kid. Is there anyone you can report this story to (a social worker or school psychologist)? It might be worth looking into.
I am scheduled to have a telephone conference with this boy's mother this week, and I will mention the incident to her and try to emphasize the importance of praise in building his self confidence.
Hopefully, the message will sink in.
I hate these sad situations :(
Keep encouraging the Mom, many people don't realize that positive feelings can be shared verbally, especially if they didn't have models of that themselves. Meanwhile, continue to pump that kid as full of love as possible!
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